criplomats

It definitely feels like spring here. The high today will be around 80 degrees and the beautiful purple jacaranda trees are blooming.

We went out for a nice brunch this morning with our Canadian neighbors Mike and Ester – they are so nice and fun to be around. They introduced us to a hopping little Oaxacan place where I had a delicious omelette with poblano sauce and John had something with mole. We got there a little ahead of most Mexican families – by the time we left there was a long line waiting to get in.

We tried a new restaurant on Thursday with a large group of folks from the Consulate – the food was good, nice outdoor atmosphere, etc. And it was nice to socialize with everyone.

Saturday, John and I both went to the office to try to get a little caught up. I just needed to clean off my desk, and do general clean-up on my emails and electronic files – things that you can’t seem to get done during the day. In the evening, we went to a party to welcome a new officer and his partner – lots of yummy vegetarian dishes.

Mom seems to be doing OK at home. Her first caregiver, Carmen, quit the agency, so there are some other ladies filling in for a couple of weeks before things settle down again. I imagine this won’t be the first time that happens; I’m glad we have the agency to deal with it. I spoke with the hospice nurse one day, and she said Mom was doing alright. I really appreciate friends and family who have gone by to visit her – and thanks to Cousin David for getting a plumber out to install a handhand shower in the bathroom!

The last eight weeks have been such a blur. I left Guadalajara on January 4th and was working in Monterrey when Mom had her stroke. I left Monterrey and was in Hot Springs until this past Wednesday when I finally returned to Mexico.

Mom seems to be fairly well settled in her house, so I felt OK about leaving (as OK as I’ll ever feel). The caregiver tells me that Mom’s cat has started sleeping on her bed which makes me (and her) very happy.

My departure was hastened a bit by the threat of more snow and ice; I left Hot Springs the night before my flight and spent the night near the airport in Little Rock, then flew standby to be sure to get out before it all hit.

It’s so wonderful to be home again. For one thing, the weather is about as perfect as you can get – high 70s or so, sunny, and clear. I stayed home on Thursday to recuperate, then went back to the office on Friday – I’ve never been so glad to return to work!

John and I are spending a relaxing weekend at home. We went out for a nice alfresco lunch with margaritas and fresh guacamole yesterday. We watched “Birdman” and started getting caught up on “House of Cards.” Flavie is glued to my lap. Life’s good.

Wm Chesley Morris with cat

Carmen is her 24/7 “live-in” caregiver. I’m not sure if she will stay full-time or will be relieved at some point by another person – I’ll leave that to the agency we are working through. It’s a bit odd to be in the house with a total stranger taking care of your mom, but Carmen seems very capable and perfectly at ease. I was worried about her ability to move Mom around, but was relieved today to learn that she had used the lift to get Mom out of the bed and to the toilet and back. It’s just impossible without a lift or at least two people since Mom’s right side is paralyzed and she’s really not able to help much, so it’s pretty much just dead weight. If Carmen can get used to the lift, then I’ll feel much better.

In addition to the home care agency that is providing 24/7 care, Mom is receiving hospice services. It’s not so much that she has a terminal illness, but she is 90, had a massive stroke, has blood pressure problems, arrhythmia, etc., so she qualifies for hospice services – which are amazing in my book. John and I kept saying, “what’s the catch?” They brought in the hospital bed, wheelchair, lift, shower chair, potty, and walker – plus they provide wipes, bed pads, gloves, pull-ups, etc. The only thing we really had to buy were sheets for the bed. A personal care attendant comes three times per week, a nurse comes once a week or as needed, and a doctor comes once per month, so we don’t have to take Mom to the doctor. They also manage all of her prescriptions (Crawford Drugstore here in town is amazing – they will deliver her meds and send me a bill at the end of the month). And the hospice folks are all so darn nice. 

John was here all week, thank goodness. I’m not sure I could have gotten through the week without him. He left today. He’s been such a trooper! We hit several of our favorite restaurants while he was here, and we met the Stokers for dinner, too. It was nice to get out of “hospital mode” for a few hours.

I have to say that my head is pretty much exploding. I have decision fatigue, worry constantly, and am not exercising. That said, I think we are doing the right thing for Mom and very soon I’ll be able to go home and go back to work. I’ve had such great support from my office, so that’s one thing I haven’t had to worry about – they just keep saying, “do whatever you need.” I’m so very fortunate in so many ways, despite the current circumstances!

I’d have to look at a family tree, but I think the man in the photo above is Mom’s grandfather. I just wanted to show that cat lovers run in the family!

Mom is back in rehab and doing well, but that still means she can’t use her right arm at all and can sort of move her right leg. Her speech is usually slurred, although sometimes is very clear. Most of the time she totally understands what you say to her; other times she sort of seems out of it. She can’t sit up without help much less stand. But bless her heart, she is giving her all in therapy – even when the doctor – for some unknown reason – gives her a drug that makes her blood pressure drop so low that all she can do is sleep. (That one has been discontinued.)

I was thrilled that John was here last week and sad to see him leave Sunday morning. He let me sleep in and took the breakfast shift with Mom – now I have to get up early – ouch!

Thanks for all the words of encouragement.